One knows this level of discipline has been reached when children are able to make appropriate behavioral choices even when we are not present. She linked the hands of the angry children and rubbed their backs as she encouraged their negotiations. If you are in a public space, it can be challenging to simply let your child work out their emotions with other people watching. These sandpaper letters provide and excellent opportunity for children to learn and understand the letters beginning at a young age. Just as the very young child must first learn to stand before she can walk, she must develop an inward order through work before she is able to choose and carry out her own acts. Your child may offer a hug or say sorry. The magical spell that enables the Montessori Child to become disciplined is his love for meaningful activity. Specialties: A premier Montessori School providing an excellent academic curriculum in West Covina and Walnut, California. So, for children of all ages, it is crucial to give them the maximum freedom possible within their range of choices. Help your child come up with a solution for how they will handle the situation again in the future. Get rid of the clutter and set up beautiful, engaging spaces for your children. Starting from a young age, have meaningful conversations with children in clear language and using vocabulary that they will understand. My child bit someone at school last month and I was so lost with how to handle it! Your email address will not be published. Model the behaviors you want to see from your children. Respectful communication We speak and listen to our children with respect. Creating a balance so that our children feel close to us, but also follow rules and respect boundaries is tricky. Its almost bedtime.. Montessori classrooms use the Positive Discipline approach created by Jane Nelsen, Ed.D. I'm glad you mentioned that we should try to use positive language when discouraging our child from biting and focus on what teeth should be used for. Once your home or classroom is set up in a safe way, you will be able to let your children take on as much as they feel comfortable without worrying that they could get hurt. Modern, clean, safe and beautiful infant facility. As a young toddler grabs for another childs toy and the other child pulls away we can say, It looks like they want to finish playing with it. Look for a quiet spot and practice deep breaths together or sing a calm and happy song together. In this post, I will be focusing specifically on how to handle toddler biting, but many of these tips will work for other types of aggressive behavior such as hitting or kicking. Montessori when done well, however, is a beautiful blend and perfect balance of freedom and structure. When schools and families develop a partnership there is greater opportunity for consistency and continuity. How Can a Real Montessori Classroom Be Identified. What is the Absorbent Mind in Montessori? If you are not seeing any improvement after some time, things seem to be getting worse or the biting is excessive, you should look into Early Intervention services (sometimes called Birth to Three or Zero to Three). Negative reinforcement will never be as powerful as positive reinforcement; it only offers an immediate solution to an ongoing problem. This website is here to provide resources for other moms wanting to use Montessori at home. Hi, Im Maggie! Over time well be there to assist them to make it up to another, and they are slowly learning how to solve problems for themselves. In these moments, its important that they adult not believe this defines who they are. Creating internal discipline and self-control takes effort, patience, and repetition. amzn_assoc_marketplace = "amazon"; In reality, Montessori's methods are more closely aligned with the true meaning of the word "discipline". Understanding why positive discipline is used in a Montessori setting is helpful as you get started, but all the knowledge in the world cant make up for lack of experience. Worse, your child may explore other ways to get those big reactions from you. Traditional School: Comparison ChartContinue, The Montessori language approach is a very specific, structured approach to language learning that varies from many traditional methods. The biggest difference between a Montessori discipline style and a more traditional method is the lack of punishment, bribes and rewards. For instance, if your child is hitting their sibling, you might stop them from playing together for a while and tell the child, I wont let you hurt your sibling.. Many battles between adults and young children occur because the child is placed in a situation that is overwhelming or too stimulating. And please follow me onPinterest(lots of Montessori-, holiday-, and theme-related boards),Instagram, andYouTube. 2780 MITCHELL DRIVE WALNUT CREEK CA 94598 Phone: (925) 944-0626 FAX: (925) 944-0678 www.springfieldmontessoriwc.com Often, Kindergarteners are still developing at the second level, processing what figures of authority expect and connecting both positive and negative actions to consequences. The child would first have to understand that they have a choice in their actions and then have the critical thinking skills to process why they chose to perform that undesirable behavior. During an outburst, tell children, I understand your anger. So much information in this post. It is actually based on the root word "disciple" which means "to teach" or "to learn." So I like to say instead of getting angry and . Here are some Montessori-inspired phrases you can use when your child shows aggressive and mean behavior. Your email address will not be published. Natural consequences can sometimes be hard for children to understand, which is why it is important for parents to both talk about natural consequences and provide them in certain instancesnot through negative reinforcement but thorough modeling. HITTING MODELS HITTING. Remind yourself that children are usually only acting on what they know. Every schools ground rules will vary but the essence is generally the same. Preschoolers can understand how another person wants them to behave and can process that information enough to express it through their own behavior. Children dont have the critical thinking skills to understand the natural consequences of their actions, which is why conversations about consequences are so important. 1. 1) speech activity- you can teach sounds or phonetics slowly like vowels as its used every word. Have conversations about both positive and negative behaviors to emphasize that every choice has consequences. amzn_assoc_placement = "adunit0"; Montessori Inspiration for Parents and Teachers, If we could say, We are respectful and courteous in our dealing with children, we treat them as we should like to be treated ourselves, we should have mastered a great educational principle and be setting an example of good education. Maria Montessori, The first idea that the child must acquire, in order to be actively disciplined, is that of the difference between good and evil; and the task of the educator lies in seeing that the child does not confound good with immobility, and evil with activity, asoften happens in the case of the old-time discipline. Maria Montessori. In the Montessori philosophy, adults are always encouraged to try to determine the cause of the tantrum before reacting. Dr. Haim Ginott was mentor to the authors of the popular discipline book, 'How to Talk so Kids Will Listen'. There are many parenting courses, which encourage this style of parenting. Keep calm, but make it clear to your child that you are stopping them from hurting other children. Two-Year-Olds hitting can sometimes be a very effective way to handle new emotions. Your childs brain is flooded with information on a daily basis. When disciplining a preschooler using the Montessori Method, it is time to have conversations using clear, direct language and vocabulary that the child can understand. Praise your child for appropriate behavior and help explain how grown-up she is acting whenever she uses these tactics instead of hitting, kicking, or biting. Simplify the choices they receive, the expectations, the directions, the task, and the activity. Youll receive some awesome freebies in the process! On Discipline - Reflections and Advice by Dr. Maria Montessori The Montessori Approach to Discipline by Mary Conroy and Kitty Williams Bravo Liberty and Discipline in the Montessori Classroom from Montessori for Everyone If they love to move around, provide more opportunities for motor skills activities, and create safe spaces that they can move around freely. There are certainly some Montessori classrooms that are very rigid and adult controlled, and there are also classroom that are disorderly and anything goes. Treat others with respect; if you cross a boundary in any relationship make it right. It is important, though, that you follow through with the next rule when emphasizing natural consequences in this way. If you see your child feeling agitated and aggressive while near other kids, make sure you stay near them so you can block and stop them from hitting other kids. However, if you observe a family or classroom that uses this approach, you might be surprised to discover that the children respond quite well to Montessori discipline methods. Montessori reading in itself is taught in quite a, Read More How to Teach Reading the Montessori WayContinue, Using Montessori at home might require a bit of initial work as you set up, but once you get started, you might be surprised to find that it feels quite natural. You can also teach your child mindfulness exercises to help develop healthy ways to calm down and control their emotions and behavior in tough situations. A child might be more inclined for a meltdown or tantrum if: If you are able to determine the root cause of the tantrum, for example that your child is over-tired, you will better be able to address the behavior. What are Montessori sandpaper letters?, Read More Montessori Letters: Using Sandpaper Letters & the Moveable AlphabetContinue, Your email address will not be published. " If the child is not yet master of his own actions, if he cannot obey even his own will, so much the less can he obey the will of someone else. Maria Montessori, The Absorbent Mind. When we say no all the time or without reason, our children may begin to ignore us. However, there are many things you can do to address this behavior. For instance, if a child is talking to neighbors in class, remind them that it is important to listen to the teacher so that they learn the lesson of the day. Montessori discipline is likely going to feel a bit unnatural or challenging when youre just getting started, but with a little time and practice, youll find that both you and your child adapt quite well. Make sure to have conversations with children when they misbehave to help them understand their emotions and what is causing the misbehavior rather than just providing negative reinforcement. However, thats not to say that we need to be perfect in order to use Montessori discipline methods. You can read a book together or draw people feeling different kinds of emotions. In addition to lessons, which teach social graces, there is a lot of emphasis placed on developing practical life skills. Unfortunately, our children are not born with an owners manual. Find ways to solve problems together Instead of bribing them to do something, we can find ways to work with them. They are always eager to take a turn playing the roles, and they are thrilled to know a better way to handle personal situations. Montessori schools emphasize self-discovery. If theyre about to hit another child, block their hand and say I cannot let you do that to him.. Cempaka Putih raya No: 21, Jakarta 10510 Indonesia, BRANCH: Jl. The children love these lessons. Disclosure: This post may contain some affiliate links (at no cost to you). Great videos! If we shout to solve problems, they learn to shout to solve problems. 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